


Stuck On You

by mylifeiskara



Series: t100 Fic for BLM Prompts [10]
Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Exes, Exes to Lovers, F/M, Past Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Pining, Post-Break Up
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-07
Updated: 2021-02-06
Packaged: 2021-03-12 05:14:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,908
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29255043
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mylifeiskara/pseuds/mylifeiskara
Summary: Emori and John broke up. They're on good terms now and they can finally hang out with their friend group without breaking into monumental fights. And it doesn't bother Emori when Murphy brings his new girlfriend to meet them all. She's completely fine. Or as fine as she can be, given the situation.Murphy is in therapy and making amends for all the pain and hurt he's caused, especially to Emori. He wants to be happy for her now that she's found someone new, but it's proving to be more difficult than he imagined.
Relationships: Emori/John Murphy (The 100), Emori/Nelson, Harper McIntyre/John Murphy
Series: t100 Fic for BLM Prompts [10]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2105646
Comments: 10
Kudos: 11
Collections: The t100 Writers for BLM Initiative





	Stuck On You

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! So a while back I was pestering people to prompt me something very specific that was on our t100 Fic for BLM prompt board, and I think I annoyed some kind anon enough that they prompted me to write this fic which is "Memori trying to move on after their break up." So thank you to that anon for enabling me to write Murphy in therapy, as is my dream.
> 
> I am very excited to share the first chapter of this fic with you guys, because it also means I also get to write a new ship, which [imunbreakabledude](https://imunbreakabledude.tumblr.com/) my friend who comes up with all my ship names for me has coined to be Nemori. I just think it's neat, guys, so now you have to read about Emori and Nelson too. 
> 
> The fic title is from the song [Stuck On You](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YLRlbHp_kOc&ab_channel=GiveonVEVO) by Giveon which I am very much obsessed with right now and I think you should all listen to it. And chapter title is the song from Taylor Swift.

Murphy fidgets in his seat, his leg shaking under the table. He hasn’t been this nervous since the night he quit drinking for good and poured all his alcohol down the drain. He picks up his latte and takes a sip, hoping that gives his hands something to do while he waits. The last time he saw Emori, the conversation didn’t necessarily end on a good note. That is, if one can call a screaming match a conversation. Things had been hard for them since the break up, and they decided to take time apart. Which was difficult when they were still in the same friend group.

It’s been over a year since Emori ended things. Murphy never expected for things to go so wrong with her. Honestly, he thought they’d be together forever, even if they did have issues. If he’s being honest with himself, Murphy doesn’t even fully remember the best parts of their relationship. They got together in an alcohol fueled haze during their junior year of college, and against their better judgement decided to give a real relationship a try. Needless to say, due to Murphy’s feeling inadequate and Emori finding her place in the world once they’d graduated, they weren’t really on the same page anymore.

Murphy has been through a lot, and he knows he put Emori through a lot while they were together. She put up with so much for him, especially when he wouldn’t admit that he had a problem. All he ever did was push her away, and of all the things he’s done to the people that care about him, that’s the thing he regrets the most.

He steadies himself and tries not to dwell too much on the past until she arrives. He takes out his six month chip and runs his finger across it. He likes the tangible reminder that he’s on the mend and taking care of himself. He’s in a much better place than he was a year ago. And he knows how much hurt and pain he caused his friends, especially Emori. He wants to make it right.

The door to the coffee shop dings and Murphy turns in its direction. Emori looks around the shop until her eyes land on him. She gives him a small smile before walking towards his table. Murphy stands up, his palms sweaty and his heart racing. He knows this might be a tough conversation ahead, but he’s ready for it. He takes a deep breath as she nears him.

“Hi, Emori,” he says quietly.

“Hi, John,” she says back.

They stand awkwardly looking at each other. It’s weird that he feels like he’s standing in front of a stranger. It’s Emori. But he doesn’t really know her, not anymore. He lost that privilege long before they even broke up.

“The chai latte is really good here. If you still like those.”

Emori nods. “Okay.” She puts her bag down on the chair across from him and takes out her wallet and goes to the counter to order.

Murphy takes a few breaths as Emori waits for her drink, running through what he wants to say to her while she’s gone. He knows a simple “I’m sorry” isn’t going to cut it. He still has no clue how this conversation is going to go, and she would be well within her rights to say she wants nothing to do with him anymore. It was generous for her to agree to come talk to him at all. He doesn’t have much more time to dwell on what could go wrong because she comes back and sits down with her drink.

“How are you?” she asks before taking a sip of her latte.

Murphy nods. “Not great, honestly. But better than I have been. How about you?”

She chuckles. “I’m fine. Life goes on.”

“Yeah. So, thank you for meeting me here today. You didn’t have to and I appreciate you coming.”

Emori nods, but doesn’t say anything. Murphy takes one last breath before launching into his somewhat prepared speech.

“So, I’m six months sober. And I’ve had a lot of time to think and talk things through with my therapist, and I know I owe you an apology. Hell, I probably owe you a lifetime’s worth of apologies for the way I treated you. I can’t blame all the problems in our relationship on alcohol, but I know it didn’t help matters much.”

Murphy looks up at her to gauge her reaction. Her face is neutral, as he suspected it would be. She’s always had an amazing poker face.

“I just want you to know I’m so sorry, Emori,” he continues. “I’m sorry for taking out my insecurities on you. I’m sorry for making you feel less than because I was feeling inadequate. You were doing so well at your new job, and it felt like you didn’t need me anymore. But instead of talking to you about it, I got mad and embarrassed and pushed you away. You deserve nothing but the best, and I couldn’t give that to you. I don’t expect you to forgive me, but I just wanted you to hear that. I really am sorry.”

Emori nods and takes a breath. “Thank you for saying that. It means a lot. And I’m sorry, too.”

Murphy shakes his head. “Emori, you don’t have to--”

“No, I’d like to. Please.”

He nods, letting her continue.

“I recognize that in my attempts to help you, I might have caused more harm than good. I shouldn’t have forced you to try to get help. I was scared and I took it out on you in the process. I’m sorry for that,” she says.

“Thank you.”

“But I’m really happy for you that you’ve taken steps to get help. Just because we broke up doesn’t mean I stopped caring.”

Relief floods through Murphy’s body at her words. He’s indescribably lucky that she’s not ripping him a new one right now when he would probably deserve it.

“I haven’t stopped caring about you either. And I’d love to be a part of your life again as your friend, if that’s alright with you.”

A small smile spreads across her face. “I’d like that.”

“Really?”

“Really.”

“Cool. And we can go at whatever pace you’re comfortable with.”

“How about we ease back in with some group gatherings to start? I’m sure everyone else will appreciate not having to plan things around which one of us says we don’t want to be in the same room with the other,” Emori jokes.

Murphy chuckles. “Yeah, they’ll definitely be excited about that.”

Emori nods. “I should probably be getting back to work.”

“Yeah, yeah.” He stands up as she gathers her things. “Thank you again for meeting me.”

She shakes her head. “It’s not a big deal, John.”

“No, it is. Seriously, Emori.”

Emori gives him a long look before saying, “I’m just glad you’re alright. And it was nice to see you.”

“It was nice to see you, too.”

She looks at him for another moment before stepping in for a short hug. Murphy is surprised at the contact, but he reacts in time to at least reciprocate the hug before it’s over.

“I guess I’ll see you around,” she says before making her way out of the coffee shop.

Murphy watches her go, letting out a breath once she’s gone. That could’ve gone way worse so he’s thankful that in the end, Emori is willing to give him a chance to at least be a friend to her. They’ve never really been friends. They jumped into a relationship before they really knew each other, so Murphy knows there will be a learning curve. But he’s willing to do anything to keep Emori in his life for as long as she wants him there. After a moment he gathers his own things and starts to head out. He has places to be, as well.

He pulls out his phone to send a quick text:

_Meeting wasn’t a total disaster!_

The reply is almost instantaneous:

_That’s so great! Can’t wait to hear more about it :)_

Murphy smiles at his phone like an idiot, but he doesn’t really care. He pockets it and makes his way across the street to his therapist’s office for his appointment.

He heads into the building and takes the elevator up to the third floor. Murphy’s been going to therapy for a little longer than he’s been sober. It’s helped a lot, to have someone to talk through things with. Murphy didn’t even know how much pent up baggage he was carrying, though his therapist would tell him not to call it baggage. But the important thing is that it’s helped him immensely and it’s one of the reasons he finally made the decision to stop drinking. So he has his therapist to thank for a lot of things, really.

He steps foot in the office and signs in before looking around the waiting room. He smiles when his eyes land on her and he goes to take their usual seat in the office together.

“So it went well with your ex?” Harper asks as he approaches her.

Murphy nods. “Yeah. And she wants to give being friends a chance.”

“That’s amazing! I’m really happy for you, Murphy.”

“Thanks.”

Harper McIntyre was an unexpected surprise in Murphy’s life. Murphy arrived to one of his first therapy appointments incredibly early, probably to ease his nerves about having to come get help from someone in the first place. Harper had the appointment before him, and she noticed Murphy shaking and asked him if he wanted to get some coffee. She walked with him across the street to a coffee shop and helped him calm his nerves a bit before she had to get back for her appointment.

Murphy didn’t mean to keep showing up so early for his appointments after that. But he just enjoyed talking to Harper for a bit beforehand. It really did help calm his nerves to see her friendly face in the waiting room. He knew it probably wasn’t good to burden Harper with all his issues when he was paying his therapist to have someone to unload on. But she was a good listener, and though she couldn’t help the way a licensed professional could, it was nice to talk to someone who wasn’t in his immediate friend group about the issues he was having. Sure his friends wanted the best for him, but they were a bit too close to the situation and their reactions were never as measured as Murphy needed them to be.

He’s known Harper for seven months, and he thinks he can safely call her a friend. She was the second person he told he was going to stop drinking, after Bellamy. Seeing her is easily one of the highlights of his week. But weirdly enough, they don’t really hang out outside of their therapist’s office. And for the first time in the seven months they’ve known each other, that bothers Murphy. He wants to see her more often.

“Do you think I could convince Dr. Jackson to give me one of the stickers he saves for the kids if I tell him my students have been acting like trash all week?” Harper wonders aloud.

Murphy feigns shock. “You would lie to get a sticker?”

She laughs. “Well it’s not actually a lie. They’ve been little shits for no reason. I blame the change in the weather.”

Murphy chuckles. “Or the fact that kids are just little shits.”

“Yeah. But they’re so cute.”

He turns his head to look at Harper. She’s smiling to herself, probably thinking about her students. She turns to look at him and a blush spreads across her cheeks when she catches him staring. Normally Murphy would be bashful and turn his head, but he’s trying to figure something out.

Lately he and Harper have been getting friendlier. He’s pretty sure some of their conversations might pass as flirting to someone on the outside looking in. Murphy hasn’t spent a lot of time thinking about flirting or dating ever since things ended badly with Emori, but lately as he’s started to feel better he wonders about the little dip his stomach does when he sees Harper in the waiting room or gets a text from her. They’ve been texting a lot too, sending each other little reminders to help get them through the day, or even just a joke or meme that reminds them of the other. It almost feels like Murphy has a crush. But he hasn’t had one of those in ages, so he’s not completely sure he can trust whatever’s going on in his head. It’s probably not much of anything, anyway. He doesn’t want to ruin coming to therapy by confusing friendship with feelings. That would be shitty, especially now that he’s finally comfortable with Dr. Jackson.

“Murphy? You there?” Harper asks, breaking Murphy out of his trance.

He looks up at her again and blushes, realizing he was probably staring for an odd amount of time. “Yeah, yeah. Just lost in thought.”

“I can imagine. It’s a lot to process when you finally make a big apology to someone.”

Murphy nods. “After Emori agreed to meet me, I spent so much time leading up to the actual meeting just thinking of all the ways it could go wrong. I think I’m still having a little trouble believing that it didn’t.”

“Well the fact that it went well should be celebrated! We should get dinner, my treat. We have to do something to commemorate that six month milestone, too,” Harper says.

Murphy stills at Harper’s suggestion. Is she asking him out? If it were a date, he thinks he’d say yes, but he’d hang out with her regardless. The thought of a date makes him nervous. He and Emori didn’t do a lot of real dates, even though they were together for three years.

“You don’t have to take me out to dinner, Harper.”

“I want to. It’s a big moment, and I’m excited for you. Plus we have to find somewhere to hang out that isn’t our therapist’s waiting room.”

Murphy laughs. “Yeah, it’d be nice to see you outside of these four walls.”

Dr. Jackson pokes his head out of his office. “Harper?”

Harper smiles at Dr. Jackson, then turns back to Murphy as she gathers her things. “Then it’s settled.”

Murphy smiles back as Harper walks into Dr. Jackson’s office. Once the door is closed behind her, he decides he can’t ignore the way he lights up when he sees her or how his heart beats a little faster when she smiles at him. He doesn’t know if he’s ready to tell her, but at least he can admit to himself that he likes Harper as a bit more than just a friend. He relishes the feeling, a new crush that makes him feel lighter than air. For the first time in a while, Murphy really does feel like he’s in a good place.

When Harper comes out of Dr. Jackson’s office, they quickly agree to get dinner the next day before Murphy rushes in to his own appointment. He spends the first twenty minutes feeling incredibly flustered, which is slightly annoying, because Dr. Jackson knows him well enough now that he notices and makes him talk about it.

Murphy feels a little less nervous going to dinner with Harper on a Wednesday. A Wednesday night dinner doesn’t seem like a date, more like two friends hanging out. Murphy knows deep down he wouldn’t be all that mad if this ended up feeling more like a date. He knows he likes Harper, but he’s not really sure how she feels about him. For all he knows, she’s just being friendly. He keeps telling himself that as his stomach dips when she walks up to him outside the restaurant.

“Hi!” she says as she nears him, a bright smile on her face.

“Hi,” he says. They look at each other for a moment before Harper goes in for the hug. It’s a little awkward. They’ve never hugged before. But Murphy can tell that she’s a good hugger, even if their first one is a little weird.

They head into the restaurant and a hostess leads them to a table. It’s quiet inside, not too many people around on a Wednesday. The ambient lighting almost makes Murphy second guess whether or not this actually is a date, but he puts the thought out of his mind.

“I don’t think I’ve ever been here before,” Murphy remarks as they sit down and look at their menus.

“Really? It’s like my new favorite Italian place,” Harper says. “Everything I’ve tried, you can’t go wrong.”

“I can never say no to pasta.”

Harper laughs, which makes Murphy’s heart skip a beat. There’s just something about Harper’s energy that makes him feel warm inside, almost in a way he’s never experienced.

The waiter comes over to take their drink orders.

“Can I have a Coke, please?” Murphy asks.

“I’ll have the same,” Harper says, smiling as the waiter walks away to get their drinks.

Murphy frowns. “You’re not gonna get a glass of wine or something?”

She chuckles. “We’re celebrating your sobriety, it feels a little backwards for me to order wine, don’t you think?”

“I just don’t want you to feel like you can’t because of me. I’m fine.”

Harper reaches out and puts a hand on top of his. “I know you are. But I want to do this.”

Murphy looks from Harper’s hand on his back to her face. He sees the sincerity in the calm smile she gives him, and he’s still floored that she cares about him to begin with. He’s not sure how he was able to ignore how he felt about Harper before now. Maybe he’s been too focused on his recovery to notice. Maybe he’s just dumb. But he knows one thing for sure, and it’s that if this isn’t a date, he’s monumentally fucked.

Once they have their sodas, Harper proposes a toast.

“Here’s to you, Murphy. I know the past year has been really difficult for you, but for as long as I’ve known you, you’ve met every challenge with resilience and adversity, even on the days it felt like too much. You’re so strong, and I feel privileged to be in your life and see you through this. I’m happy for you, and I’m proud of you,” she says.

“Cheers,” Murphy says as he blinks back a few tears and clinks his glass to hers.

Yeah, he’s definitely fucked.

The rest of their dinner goes well. He can’t believe this is really the first time that he and Harper are hanging out outside of therapy. He doesn’t know why they didn’t do it sooner. She’s funny, caring, and a breath of fresh air. And Murphy’s almost positive he can sense a flirty undertone in a lot of her conversation. She laughs at his stupid jokes, which he also takes as a good sign, and every so often she just tilts her head and smiles at him, content for them to just let a moment of silence pass between the two of them. Murphy hasn’t felt so immediately comfortable with someone in a while.

It’s time for the check and Harper insists, reminding Murphy it was her treat in the first place. He laughs as she swipes the bill away from him. Once Harper has her credit card back, they put on their coats and make their way outside.

Murphy’s sad the night has to come to an end. He doesn’t think he’s had this much fun in a while, and he owes it all to Harper. They move to the side so others can pass them on the sidewalk if need be.

“Thank you for tonight,” he says. “I had a really nice time.”

Harper nods. “Yeah, me too. We should hang out outside of Dr. Jackson’s office more often.”

Murphy chuckles. “Definitely.”

They look at each other for a moment, both smiling, unsure of what comes next. Murphy notices Harper’s eyes drift to his lips and he steps in ever so slightly.

“Would it make things weird if I kissed you right now?” he asks.

Harper shakes her head, a smile spreading across her face. “No, it would not make things weird.”

Murphy grins. “Good.” He leans in, his stomach flipping even though he already got verbal confirmation that Harper wants to kiss him. She leans in too and the next thing he knows, his lips are on hers.

The kiss isn’t long, but Murphy is still able to relish in the brief moment of their lips pressed together. He can feel Harper smiling, as if maybe she’s wondered about this for a while now, too. He sighs at the thought of someone wanting him even when he’s got so much shit going on.

“That was nice,” Harper says once they pull away.

Murphy chuckles. “Yeah. Listen, Harper. I like you. Hell, I really like you. And I’d like for us to maybe continue this. But I’m not completely sure what dating looks like right now. I mean, it’s been six months, but it’s still fairly early into my sobriety. I should probably ask my sponsor for some advice, I mean—”

Harper takes his hand to calm his rambling. “Hey. I like you, too. And we can take things at whatever pace you need them to go. There’s no rush.”

“You’re really nice, you know that?”

She laughs. “So I’ve heard.”

Murphy leans in to kiss Harper again, this time lingering for a moment, trying to memorize the feel of her touch. Kissing her makes his head spin in the best way.

“Would you like to hang out outside of Dr. Jackson’s office with me on Saturday?” Murphy asks.

“I’d like that.”

“Okay, well I guess I’ll text you.”

“Yeah. See you later, Murphy.” With that Harper kisses his cheek and walks in the direction of her subway stop. Murphy looks after her for a moment, yet another stupid grin on his face, but he hasn’t felt so incredibly giddy in a long time.

Eventually Murphy turns and heads to his own subway stop and makes his way back to his apartment. He can’t stop smiling to himself the whole way home, replaying the events of the night in his head. He didn’t expect Harper to have this much of an effect on him right off the bat.

For most of the ride, he finds himself thinking about how things started with Emori. It’s only natural, seeing as that was his last and only relationship, really. The beginning of their relationship was markedly different, starting with a drunken hook-up at a party that both of them decided they were fine with continuing. Everything about their start was frenzied and rushed, but that’s what Murphy thought he liked about it. He didn’t want to be boring, he wanted to keep people on their toes, and Emori agreed with him. He thought for sure he’d found his dream girl.

With Harper, he doesn’t mind being boring. In fact, Murphy would prefer to be boring for the rest of his life if it means getting his life back on track. Bellamy’s always telling Murphy that the best relationships start as friendships. At first Murphy thought it was Bellamy making a thinly veiled dig at the fact that he and Emori barely knew each other when they got together, but maybe he’s got a point. In the end, them not really knowing each other was part of their downfall. It makes Murphy feel guilty all over again, that he dated someone for three fucking years and never really spent time learning more about her. He’d really been a shitty boyfriend. And this thing with Harper isn’t serious yet, but he knows he doesn’t want to be a shitty boyfriend to her if things end up going that route. He hopes they’ll end up there, at least.

He lets himself into the apartment and is only slightly surprised to see Bellamy sitting at their kitchen table. He looks up and frowns, pushing his glasses up on his face.

“Where have you been?” Bellamy asks. As Murphy steps further into the apartment he sees that Bellamy is grading papers.

“I had an AA meeting,” Murphy lies. It’s not that he wants to lie about Harper, but he doesn’t want Bellamy to have any reactions. He’s pretty sure the reaction would be excitement, but that’s not what he’s in the mood for. Bellamy has been awfully worried about him lately, and sometimes it’s nice, but other times it makes Murphy want to throw something.

Bellamy narrows his eyes. “On Wednesday? I thought you did that on Mondays.”

“I went to a different one with my sponsor. I honestly didn’t think you’d be up, you’ve been going to bed so early lately.”

“I’m behind on grading papers, so I figured I’d catch up.”

“Gross. Have fun with that.” He starts to make his way back to his room.

“Hey, Murphy?” Bellamy calls after him.

“Yeah?”

“Happy six months.”

Murphy smiles. “Thanks, Bellamy.”

His roommate smiles and goes back to grading papers. Murphy has never been more grateful to have someone like Bellamy in his life. Eight months ago, Murphy showed up on Bellamy’s doorstep, a little too drunk after a particularly brutal fight with Emori. He was alienating his friends, and he had never felt more alone in his life. Bellamy welcomed him with open arms and without judgement. He’s not sure where he’d be without him.

Once Murphy’s in his room he kicks off his shoes and lies back on his bed. He’s a little too amped up to try to sleep yet, so many thoughts running through his head after his nice evening out. He tries his hardest to commit this feeling of sheer happiness to memory, not sure how long it will last. Harper has been one of the bright spots in this past year for him, and he hopes to whatever higher being is out there that he doesn’t fuck this up.

**_______________________**

Emori doesn’t like change. She’s content with the way things are. She has a decent job, a best friend that she gets to work with everyday, and her roommate Clarke is not completely terrible. In fact she’d say they’re pretty good friends at this point. Seeing someone through as rough a break up as Emori went through with John does wonders for getting to know a person. And Clarke was pretty solid through the whole situation.

When she got the text from John asking if she’d be willing to meet him, she couldn’t focus for the rest of the day. So much had gone wrong between the two of them and more often than not, she blamed herself for everything that went wrong. She felt terrible for finally deciding she’d had enough. Maybe if she’d stayed just a little longer, she could have helped him through it. If only she’d stuck it out, he would’ve gotten better. But Emori knows that’s not true. It took a lot of time to accept that John just wasn’t ready to accept help, no matter how much it hurt that he pushed her away.

Being with John felt like such a sure thing, something that Emori took for granted now that she thinks about it. But now that their good times are so clouded by the bad ones that won out, she’d been conflicted about wanting him in her life anymore. She decides that hearing him out is a good first step, because of course there’s the small part of her that wants nothing more than to just put everything bad that happened behind them and let him in again. But she can’t do that. She can’t forget, not when it mars her thoughts and makes her wonder if he ever really loved her in the first place.

She steps into work the day after her coffee with John feeling slightly lighter. The thought of maybe getting things back to somewhat normal—or as normal as they can be—feels good. She wants to be able to be in a room with him without having it devolve into a screaming match. She’s tired of bowing out of activities when John is going to be there, not wanting to make things weird for the rest of their friends. She’s upset that she hasn’t really seen Bellamy lately since he and John are living together now, and she knows he feels a little awkward trying to be both of their friends at the same time, even if he won’t admit it. So yesterday is a good step towards normal, and Emori couldn’t be happier about it.

“Emori!” a voice calls.

Emori turns to see Nelson walking towards her, a friendly smile on his face like always.

“How’s it going, Nelson?” she asks as he falls into step with her.

“Pretty good. Did the meeting with your ex go okay?”

She raises an eyebrow, honestly a little surprised that he remembered that. She’d been sitting with Nelson at lunch when John texted her asking to meet, so she obviously couldn’t hide what had set her on edge. She didn’t give many details, just that things had ended badly and they hadn’t really spoken in eight months.

“It went pretty well. We’re going to try to be in each other’s lives again,” she tells him.

“Hey, that’s really great!” Nelson reaches out and pats Emori’s arm. “I’m glad you guys were able to work out being friends.”

Emori chuckles. “I’d say that’s generous. But I think we’ll be able to get back to that one day, at least.”

“And that’s all you can hope for, really. We still on for lunch?”

“Wouldn’t miss it.”

Nelson nods. “Great. I’ll see you later.”

Emori watches as Nelson rounds the corner and goes to his desk. She takes off her coat and hangs it on the hook before sitting down at her own desk. Raven is already at hers, which is no surprise seeing as she’s early to everything.

“Good morning,” Emori says as she turns on her computer.

Raven doesn’t immediately answer, so Emori turns around only to find her best friend staring at her intently.

“Okay, creepy much?”

“Nelson’s pretty cute, huh?” Raven says.

Emori frowns. “I hadn’t really thought about it.”

“Come on, Emori. I know you’re in a weird spot, but you have eyes at least!”

“He’s cute, okay? You happy?”

“Yeah. Because he’s been flirting with you for weeks and it’s getting sad that you haven’t seemed to notice.”

Emori scoffs. She swivels in her chair to look at Raven, who has gone back to sending an email. “Nelson has not been flirting with me. We’re friends.”

Raven shrugs, not looking up from her computer. “Yeah, you’re friends. But that doesn’t mean he’s not into you.”

“You’re being ridiculous, Raven.”

“Am I? Or am I just very observant? And it’s a good thing I am, seeing as you’re completely clueless.”

Emori ducks her head, feeling her face heat up. She’s never been the best at figuring out when guys are giving her attention. And she’s not actively looking for attention from anyone, anyway. The break up was hard for her, even if it was almost two years ago at this point.

“I’m not clueless,” she eventually says. “I’m just not looking for anything right now.”

Raven shrugs. “What’s the harm in just flirting a little back, though? It’s not like you have to marry the guy.”

“But I still have to work with him. What if we got assigned to a project and I completely misread a situation and flirted with him? It would be a disaster.”

“Yeah, you just keep telling yourself that.”

Emori rolls her eyes before finally opening her email and starting her day. Working with her best friend certainly has its perks, but she’s not really seeing the benefit of it today. Especially now that Raven’s put the idea of Nelson flirting with her in her head.

Nelson is Emori’s work friend, first and foremost. Last year she was having a weird day after a brutal fight with John, and he brought her a chocolate bar from the vending machine to cheer her up. He said he’d seen her getting that kind before and it looked like she could use a pick-me-up. From there Emori realized they tended to take the same lunch break, so they started sitting together. They talked about the different projects they were working on and Nelson would make little jokes and observations about their other coworkers. He had a knack for making Emori laugh, and she appreciated that. Right from the start, things with Nelson had always been easy. But that doesn’t mean that Nelson is flirting with her. Raven doesn’t know what she’s talking about.

Emori’s morning is fairly busy, which she’s glad for. If she weren’t she’d probably be spending too much time overthinking every interaction she and Nelson had ever had now that Raven put this idea in her head. Unfortunately she has a meeting that Nelson is also a part of right before lunch. She didn’t realize he was assigned to this particular project as well. She tries to keep her eyes trained on the screen where her boss is presenting, but her eyes can’t help but drift to Nelson every so often.

She can’t deny he’s good looking. He’s not necessarily the type that she would normally go for, but that hasn’t worked in her favor in the past, so it wouldn’t be a bad idea to expand her horizons. Being so caught up in her break up and moving on, she hasn’t really allowed herself to notice other people. Nelson stares intently at the screen, looking down at his notebook every so often to take notes. He laughs at something her boss says, his eyes crinkling. It’s a stark contrast to see a guy so joyful when Emori’s used to John and his dark moods. Even in their better times, he never seemed all that happy. She shakes her head, trying to stop those thoughts. It would be useless to try and compare Nelson to John. She doesn’t want to go down that road, not when she should just be focusing on herself.

Eventually Nelson must feel her eyes on him because he turns his head in her direction. He gives her a smile, and she ducks her head in embarrassment. She didn’t realize how long she’d been staring. He goes back to looking at the screen. He’s certainly doing a much better job of paying attention at this meeting than Emori is. She’ll have to ask if she can look at his notes later.

By the time lunch rolls around, Emori is weirdly nervous. She’s spent too much time preoccupied with whether or not Nelson likes her, and she’s not sure what would be worse at this point: him actually liking her, or her misreading everything and somehow getting her hopes up that maybe he is into her after all.

Nelson sits down at their table, breaking her out of her trance. “What’s on the menu today?” he asks.

“Turkey sandwich, nothing that interesting,” Emori says. “My roommate tried to make some brownies last night but the attempt went disastrously wrong. So no dessert for me.”

Nelson laughs. “Well I have a piece of pound cake, if you’d like to share that with me.”

“Oh no, I don’t want to take your dessert.”

“I don’t mind. Honestly, I have too much of it at home. That’s what I get for baking when my roommate is vegan. Means more sweets to myself, but then I have the heavy burden of finishing them all.”

Emori chuckles. “Well, if you don’t mind.”

Nelson smiles, breaking off a piece of his pound cake and putting it on a napkin for her. He slides it to her and she reaches out to take it from him, a little unnerved as their hands touch. She feels her face heat up as she takes it from him, but hopes that her hair in front of her face hides her blush.

“Thanks,” she says.

“No problem. I hope you like it. I wouldn’t consider myself a master baker, but I like to think I’m fairly okay at it.”

She takes a bite and almost moans as the flavors hit her mouth. “I think you’re selling yourself a bit short there. This is delicious.”

He chuckles. “Thanks.”

“What other things do you bake?”

“Whatever I’m in the mood for, honestly. I find it to be a calming process, so I try to make something as often as I can.”

Emori nods. “Baking to relieve stress. I’ve never thought to do that before. But then again, I’m not much better at baking than my roommate, so I guess that’s probably why. ”

“I could teach you a few things, if you were ever interested,” Nelson adds nonchalantly.

She turns to him, surprised at the offer. She can’t read the expression on his face, but even though he’s acting as if it’s nothing, it still seems like a big deal that he asked. Maybe she really is reading too much into this now that Raven called it out. Nelson is just friendly. But spending time with him outside of work doesn’t seem like it would be so terrible.

“I’d be interested,” she answers. “I always have a taste for baked goods and knowing how to make them rather than going to a bougie bakery to buy them would probably save me a great deal of money.”

Nelson laughs. “Yeah, I’d say so.”

Emori doesn’t let herself think that Nelson could be into her for the rest of lunch. It’s already distracted her too much today, and she doesn’t want to seem tense when her companion clearly isn’t. Unfortunately now she’s distracted by the fact that she might like Nelson a little bit. Maybe it’s just because Raven put the idea in her head, so it’s more like the power of suggestion. But she can’t discount how sweet he is and how he genuinely seems to care about what’s going on with her.

They spend the rest of lunch just joking, not talking about anything too serious. Emori has come to really appreciate Nelson in the past year. He’s cheered her up countless times when she didn’t even realize she needed cheering up. He’s been there for her in more ways than he knows, especially considering they’ve never hung out outside of work before. It’s almost enough reason for Emori to not want anything romantic to happen between the two of them, even if she’s realizing she might like him at least a little bit. If things were to go disastrously wrong, she’d lose a friend. And with Emori’s track record with relationships, there was a good chance things could go disastrously wrong.

Nelson jokingly asks if he can walk Emori back to her desk. She laughs and says yes, and they take the short walk from the break room back to her department. They’re both a bit quieter than before, as if something has been cast over their usual proceedings. Emori figures she’s probably still too in her head, and things are fine. This is normal. She just has to keep telling herself that.

She turns to say goodbye as they get to her wing and sees that Nelson has just opened his mouth to say something. He looks more nervous than he has all afternoon.

“Nelson, is something wrong?” Emori asks.

He shakes his head. “No, nothing’s wrong. I was just going to ask if maybe you wanted to get dinner this weekend?”

Her stomach flips. “Like on a date?”

He lets out a nervous chuckle, scratching at his head. “Yeah. I mean, if you’re not into it, that’s fine. We can pretend like this never happened. But I just enjoy spending time with you, and I think you’re very smart and pretty and I wanted to know if maybe you wanted to go out. Maybe make a habit of seeing each other someplace other than work?”

Emori is slightly stunned by Nelson’s admission. So maybe Raven wasn’t being crazy after all. She’s never had someone be so straightforward with the reasons they like her. And nobody’s called her pretty in a long time. In all honesty, she’s a little overwhelmed. Emori has always known one day she’d move on and date someone else, but she wasn’t expecting that person to potentially be her coworker. And sure, she’s over John. She has been for a while. Even so, she’s not sure she felt ready for this today. But then again, when will she ever be ready if she doesn’t just allow it to happen?

She looks at Nelson, knowing she can’t just stand here and stare at him. She needs to at least give him an answer. Her heart is pounding more than she would’ve expected. It’s a simple yes or no question. Why is she having such a hard time with this? Like Raven said earlier, it’s not like she has to marry the guy. It’s just one date. What’s the worst that could happen?

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you guys liked it! Let me know what you think.
> 
> I actually have to finish the outline for this fic before I continue just to like get things squared away in my brain, but I am thinking it will be around 5 or 6 chapters. I try to keep a fairly up to date (tentative) schedule as the [pinned post](https://queenemori.tumblr.com/post/641216982338945024/karas-upcoming-fic-schedule-this-is-my-pinned) on my blog, so you can see when this might be in the pipeline with other WIPs and my BLM prompts.
> 
> Speaking of, don't forget to check out more info about t100 Fic for BLM on [our carrd](https://t100fic-for-blm.carrd.co/)! We've also got lots of cool stuff on social going on for Black History Month. 
> 
> And as always, don't forget to find me on [Tumblr](https://queenemori.tumblr.com/) and [Twitter](https://twitter.com/queen_emori).


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